"All words are symbols that represent unspeakable realities. Which is also why words are magical." (Donald Miller tweet)

Monday, February 17, 2014

our first fight

We've been together for 8 months or so.

And let me tell you, the honeymoon came to a crashing halt today.

Until just a few days ago, we were taking it slow, I got to set the pace, sometimes there were challenges, but all in all I felt good about the way things were going. Really good.

And then I decided to hand over the controls on Saturday. It was boring. So blah.

Like seriously, is this all you think I'm capable of?
Good grief, I'm better than this.
I need a relationship that's going somewhere, that challenges me.

So today, I took back the controls on my treadmill. Or I thought I did.

I went to Program 2. But this time I pulled out the manual and actually customized it for me, my needs, my wants.

Program 1 had had only one minute labelled "peak speed" and I didn't even break a sweat on it on Saturday. So when Program 2 asked what I would like to set for my peak speed, I went a little on the high side.

… I'll show you … silly treadmill, thinking I can't keep up …

And when it asked how long I wanted to go, I sniffed smugly and set a length of time that I thought was reasonable.

Pressed start, iPhone playlist ready, Kindle open.

What could possibly go wrong?

...

Oh Lawd.

Program 2 took me at my word, except Program 2 goes at "peak speed" for twelve minutes, not one. And there are many, many hills. And even if, in desperation, one lowers the incline, it sneaks it right back up 30 seconds later, without telling the one who lowered it.

I may have verbalized some nasty thoughts between gasps.

It's possible I hurled my cheery playlist across the room.

It's also possible that I should have waited a little longer
after my big bowl of breakfast oatmeal before running.

But I finished. Glared at the treadmill, which stared back at me impassively.

We are definitely going to have to talk.

Just as soon as I can breathe.