"All words are symbols that represent unspeakable realities. Which is also why words are magical." (Donald Miller tweet)

Friday, June 18, 2010

poly-gnomials, by Jarod

I came in to work this morning, and found this on the blackboard outside my office. I can only assume it was left there by Jarod, although it's possible an actual poly-gnomial visited me.

(Edit: I didn't realize there was more behind the bookshelf, which had to be moved, with a lot of grunting on my part. Jarod told me that. But I didn't listen. My bad. So I'm re-publishing with the FULL post. Then I'm going to see my chiropractor again.)


And so, ladies and germs, I present you with the very first ever guest-post in this space. Enjoy.

Poly-gnomials

deriv: polus-gnomialis

Contrary to popular belief, poly-gnomials mean no harm or ill intent to humans. Like humans, poly-gnomials can range from fairly simple to rather complex.

Further study is needed.

Should you encounter a PG, go up and say, "Hi! Nice to meet you!" as this is their most formal tradition.

It is not known how long they have been among us, only that we know they won't leave.

Think of our dear friend Igor the monster. He is made up of many varrying body parts (though few are his and no two come from the same source). Like Igor, PG's are made up of different parts and different sources.
We have discovered that the average PG is comprised of 2L+2A+1H=PG where L=legs, A=arms and H=head. There are other essential parts, but those can be factored down into one of the other subtypes. Thus a poly-gnomial is formed.