You get an education. You get the necessary credentials. You get the job.
And then 15 years later, you're still learning what they never said you'd have to know.
So if theological and pastoral educators out there care to hear from someone who's been in the pastoring trenches for awhile, I have a few things to say:
1. Pastors need to know how to buy alarm systems, phone systems and photocopiers.
2. Pastors do not need to know how to arrange flowers for when parishioners come to tea. (Seriously. It was in one of my textbooks.)
3. Pastors need to know how to set mousetraps, set up chairs and push a mop.
4. Pastors do not need to know Hebrew. (Although we SAY we do - it makes us feel smart.)
5. Pastors need to be technologically, culturally and politically savvy in all areas, at all times.
6. Pastors do not need to know the kings lists. (I say this with all due respect to Professor B., who made us memorize them, and thus helped us realize how the little stories fit together into one big story. Still. No one has actually asked me to recite a list of Old Testament kings and how they died, since graduation.)
7. Pastors need to know everyone's names. Everyone's. Instantly. Even if you haven't seen them in 25 years.
That's all for now. Oh wait, one more, and it's a must.
I don't know why none of my profs addressed it. Because if you don't have this skill....well, I don't know if you'll survive.
It's essential.
Any guesses?
You must, absolutely MUST KNOW, how to laugh. As much as possible. If you snort milk out your nose, even better.
Blogging's good too.
