"All words are symbols that represent unspeakable realities. Which is also why words are magical." (Donald Miller tweet)

Friday, January 07, 2011


We recently re-discovered a wedding gift that had been in storage.

When we received it, it was dutifully appreciated, but I couldn't imagine why anyone would really need it. Now I am old. And I am cold. And Spike pointed out to me a few weeks ago that we had an electric blanket with dual controls that we have never used, and perhaps we would like to try it out. I'm guessing that my half hour of full-body shivering each night is less than pleasant for him. Either that, or he truly cares about my comfort. Maybe a little of both.

Can I tell you something?

i love the electric blanket. and it loves me.

i can't imagine what i was thinking, having it in a storage closet all this time. spike wondered aloud the other day if it was going to impact our electricity bill, and i looked at him, wide-eyed in fear, and quietly stated, "i'm not going back." "i know," he sighed.

Last night we were on our way home from playing Sequence with some friends, and it was late, and it was cold, and I was tired, and I wished that we had a turn-the-blanket-on-before-we-get-home app on our phones.

Note: Our phones have no apps at all. You can talk or text on them. And write yourself a memo. There is a calendar, but I can't figure out how to use it. Any conversations we have about "apps" are purely theoretical.

Theoretical conversations are way more fun than realistic ones. We considered some other apps that might be really helpful to people in the app world. Here are a few.

"pick up the cat turd" app. Self-explanatory, I think. For times like this.

"get up to pee in the middle of the night" app. Wouldn't that be lovely? No more lying half awake, hoping that you can just hang on until morning. No more shivering down the hall. Just use the app.

"roadie" app. Not all of you need this, but musicians like Spike do. You have no idea how much time is spent hauling gear, packing gear, transporting gear, unpacking gear, setting up gear, sound-checking gear ... playing a show ... and then tearing down gear, packing gear, transporting gear home, where you unpack the gear and haul it into your home. Usually in the middle of the night. Not to mention changing strings over and over again. A roadie app would be a real benefit, I think.

I'm going to keep thinking about this. Surely I can make some money with these brilliant ideas.

Meanwhile ... me and my electric blanket are very happy together.


chRistine said...

i got an electric blanket for christmas. i LOVE LOVE LOVE pre-heating my bed. i LOVE being swaddled in warmth. I cannot say enough good things about my blanket.

Anonymous said...

ORRRR...you could turn the blanket on low before you leave.

This will not adversely impact your hydro bill. If anyone (Spike) is worried that it may, you could cover that cost by pulling a significant other plug. The one that keeps all his man-electronics on ready-to-leap-to-life-at-the-touch-of-a-remote.

E-mail experts all agree there can be significant savings by doing so.

Just wanna be a blessing.

Patti said...

Oooohhhhh, anonymous, that is a cheeky idea.

I like it.

Spike said...

Hey Anonymous... I want a name... lol.

Soozin said...

Sequence! I haven't played that in ages.. I think we have one downstairs too. Just getting into playing card games with the kids too after getting some for Christmas. Sounds fantastic.
My parents who also live up here in the snow belt LOVE their electric blanket. Especially since my father's heart attack he can't seem to get warm enough.

vjc said...

Have you seen the commercial where the guy calls his wife who is just getting on a plane and she says "Ok once more." And with her (whatever electronic device) she locks and unlocks their car.

I'm thinking when you have an app like that, it's time to stop letting the kiddos play with it. I'm also thinking the success of the ad may be colored by the fact that I have no idea what product the ad was for.

P.s. Have been debating the electric blanket and you may have just tipped the scales. Here's to toasty-moasty.

elizainkorea said...

Well I really don't need an electric blanket because my bedroom floor heats up in my place. (I live in Seoul, Korea) And in fact it can be so warm that this year, I gave away my flannel sheets since I didn't use them at all last winter.

Patti said...

elizainkorea - your bedroom floor HEATS UP?? So. Very. Jealous. ;)